Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize