I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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