My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize