Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize