who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
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