Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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