Kareoke will never be a sober sport
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
