Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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