I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
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