I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize
