Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
