"it" just moved
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Randomize
