I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
