I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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