can we get nightvision for the apartment?
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
