Don't you send me to vm
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Randomize
