The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
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