Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
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