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• (303): View more from Colorado

  No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.

  (303): View more from Colorado

  well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you

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• (772): View more from Florida

  remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.

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• (716): View more from New York

  Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.

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• (408): View more from California

  Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.

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• (845): View more from New York

  New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.

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• (507): View more from Minnesota

  My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.

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• (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight

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• (415): View more from California

  A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."

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• (802): View more from Vermont

  I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..

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• (616): View more from Michigan

  You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Did you put my shoes in the freezer.

  (1-617): View more from Massachusetts

  Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.

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