Where is the hickey?
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Randomize