This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
im six kinds of drunk right now
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
