She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
