Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
