Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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