We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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