He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
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