David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
God I need to hump something, right now.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
