i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Randomize
