Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize
