hell yes lets make some ravioli
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
