Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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