I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
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