Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Randomize
