Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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