Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Everything about him screamed your future.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize
