Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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