Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
