Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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