His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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