Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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