Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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