New low: just hacked my moms facebook
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
