He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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