i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
