Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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