I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I pour the whiskey from now on
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
