they said they heard you say put it in my butt
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
