Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
