so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Randomize
