On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Randomize
