I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
