i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Randomize
